Were I the center of the Universe, processed sugar would be a major food group, it would be illegal for grown-ups to wear Care Bear pajamas, and boxed wine would be respected for the genius it is.
ilovezim29 says FML
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Today, I went to Safeway. The secutity guard wouldn't stop staring at my
boobs. When I confronted him about it he told me that they looked fake and
he was ...